"There's werewolves?" "Yes." "Shit…Bigfoot--is he real, too?" "I dunno, I guess it's possible." "Santa?"Sookie talks to him about how strange it is for Bill to really be gone: "I keep expecting him to come through the door and say, 'Sookeh!' " (Imagine how much fun Anna must've had doing that impression!) It feels really strange to see her in her Merlotte's uniform later that day, but in the condensed show time, she has really only missed about a week or so of work. There's a werewolf watching her from the trees, but he quickly runs off. Terry doesn't understand who this guy was, but seeing how scared Sookie is, he gives her a gun to carry around: "I've always liked you, and…I'd miss you if you got killed." Meanwhile, Arlene is having scary mood swings, and Terry still doesn't know why. Sweetheart that he is, he makes a list for her: "Ten reasons why you can trust me with your kids. Number one: I'm a nurturer. I found a baby armadillo by the side of the road, and I nursed it. Now it sleeps under my bed, and its name is Figgins. Number two: I have a diploma in anger management, where I learned talking about your feelings is the manly thing to do." Before he could continue, Arlene ran off to the bathroom to puke again. Terry just keeps talking to her through the door: "Number three: I never killed nothing by accident..." Over in Arkansas, Sam had followed Tommy Mickens home and fallen asleep in his car. He is awakened in the morning by Tommy and his shotgun. Tommy brings Sam inside to find out why he was asking questions about their family. Melinda and Joe Lee are...a bit rough around the edges. They look like they might be constantly drunk, but it doesn't take long before Melinda realizes that this is the son she gave away 34 years before. She tries to explain why she gave him up--she was only 16 (not to mention a supernatural being) and Joe Lee was in prison. The Merlottes seemed like they could make a better life for Sam. Tommy is mad that he never knew he had a brother, that his freak family is so messed up, and that he couldn't have been adopted. He and Sam don't really know what to talk about, so they decide to go for a run--Sam, the collie, and Tommy, the pit bull. They seem to be enjoying themselves, but Tommy leads Sam out into the street in front of a truck that almost hits him. There were more great buddy scenes between Jason and Andy. Jason has no one else he can talk to about what he's feeling: "I keep trying to do good all the time, but all I ever end up doing is hurting people." "You're a good guy, Stackhouse," Andy assures him. "You got a lotta heart. You're prettier than most girls..." Andy thinks Jason just needs to apply himself. And he gets an opportunity to do just that when he rides along with Andy on a police call busting a meth lab in Hot Shot. Jason is supposed to be waiting in the car, but he gets out when he sees a mysterious crying girl in the woods. Then when the suspect flees, Jason tackles him: "Hey, I got one! I got a drug dealer!" It's cute to see him so proud, but this is going to put another ridiculous idea into his head... Back at Russell's mansion, Bill is finally hearing Russell's plan for him, as Talbot serves carbonated blood with a hint of tangerine, blood bisque infused with rose petals, and blood gelato (all made cruelty-free). Russell wants to make Bill the Sheriff of Mississippi Area 2, and to have Bill help convince Queen Sophie-Anne to unite the kingdoms of Mississippi and Louisiana through a marriage. While Russell goes on and on about wanting to learn the Queen's secrets, Bill insists that he doesn't know any of them. Russell is unconvinced: "You honestly expect me to believe that she would allow you to move to a tiny town in the middle of a swamp and date a waitress?" (We know she's much more than a waitress, and given the file hidden away at Bill's, other people know that, too.) Russell threatens Sookie, and Bill panics. He tries to convince the King that Sookie isn't involved, when Lorena walks in with a smirk on her face, calling Bill "delusional" for his stubborn romantic notions. Suddenly Bill understands why he has been brought here, and in his fury, he grabs a lamp and hurls it at her. She instantly catches on fire and falls to the floor shrieking. (I just wish that could be the end of her...) Lafayette and Tara shared several wonderful scenes in this episode. After Lafayette broke in the door to the bathroom, he prevented her from swallowing all the pills in his medicine cabinet. He carries her to his car to go to the hospital. She says she's fine, but it's clear that is not the case. Lafayette knows she's grieving and that it feels too painful to bear: "Life is suffering. It don't mean you get to check out early and leave me here." He takes her to see his demented mother, Ruby Jean (Alfre Woodard), in the mental care facility, as if to show her: this is what happens when you're not strong enough to deal with the world. Ruby Jean is crazy and mean. She makes racist remarks to Jesus (Kevin Alejandro), the gentle nurse who cares for her, and tells people that Lafayette is dead because he's gay. He has more problems than we knew, but he finds a way to cope "There's some darkness in this family, Tara. My mama, your mama. They ain't strong enough to be that we are. We been fuckin' fightin' tooth and nail to survive this bullshit our whole life. And I ain't lettin' you give up now." Lafayette takes Tara with him to Merlotte's so she won't be alone while he's at work. A tall, dark, and handsome vampire strikes up a conversation with her. And then we see his feet, wearing those boots, and all of a sudden the mystery of Franklin Mott begins. Tara goes outside and starts drowning her sorrows, but then she overhears a couple of rednecks disrespecting Eggs. She goes over and hits one of them. Franklin zooms in and restrains the other one so that she can beat on him, too (such a gentleman!). At the end, Sookie is sitting in her house holding the gun. Eric shows up to share a little more of what he knows. The Nazi werewolf he trapped during World War II revealed that her master was a vampire. Whatever experiences Eric has had with this pack since then have taught him that these werewolves are even more dangerous than others--they're strong, organized, and fueled by vampire blood. Having told Sookie this, Eric knows that these werewolves are coming for her: "You're going to invite me in. So I can protect you. Or have passionate, primal sex with you. How about both?" Then he sees the engagement ring on her finger. She's still Bill's (for now). He seems amused by the vows that she and Bill would make at their wedding: "To love and to cherish, blah blah blah…'til death do you part. Doesn't bother you that you'll be the only one doing the dying?" Then a sound inside the house catches his attention. All seriousness, he pushes Sookie up against the wall: "Invite me in," he commands, fangs out. She senses the danger and responds quietly, "Mr. Northman, won't you please come in?" Eric walks in and squares off against the werewolf with a smile, as Sookie walks in, gun raised, and pulls the trigger. The episode ends, quite literally, with a bang. It was superbly written by Raelle Tucker, giving us humor, intrigue, and touching character moments. So what did you all think of this one? (Photo credit: HBO Inc.)
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